Shandrelle Reveals Her Motives

"You are makin a bitch irritated!"  The words came out of my cat Lightning as she lay sideways on my hardwood floor, tilting her fat head as she spoke.

"Shandrelle," I said, "I just need to explore the complexities of these issues a bit more."

"That's your trouble, you an asshole."

"I beg your pardon?  I thought you were on my side."

"Always talkin', never listenin'.  Just do the thang and get on with it for fuck's sake.  You got me stuck here in this smelly-ass cat until I achieves my goal.  Then next lifetime I get to be a ballerina instead of a ho - it's in my contract."

"We get contracts?"

"Contract? At this rate you be lucky to come back as a fuckin' paperweight. Do just as much damn good, no damn good at all, you damn load."

Then Lightning farted loudly and Shandrelle was gone, vanished in the dissapating methane.